In climbing, part of the Warrior’s Way is to ask oneself, is this part of the climb making me uncomfortable or scared? If the answer is yes, this is where you start practicing falling. You choose to keep falling in that area until it becomes not scary, familiar, and you know what to expect. It’s brilliant.

Have the discipline to not give up on yourself. Stay the course.

Fate is something that will happen and Destiny is one of the five options we choose from, on how to get there. We plan for certain routes and find that the ones we took are not quite what we had intended, no matter how strong the resolution or will. The most frustrations we experience are when we are using all of our Will to try and make something happen; something we Want, rather than allowing whatever it is to take place that we Need.

The next time you find yourself making some very resolute life plans, remember, you can plan as much as you want and attempt to execute with all the might you have. And it may come out exactly as you had envisioned. But keep an open heart and mind that it may go in a very different direction as Life may have a different vision for you.

It is rare for us to just sit, and be satisfied in the moment. In the chaos of it all. To just revel in life. To go, wow this is perfect as it is. I am always looking at my laundry basket and thinking, when it’s empty, all the clothes are washed, dried and nicely put away, I’ll feel better. Even if it’s for just one day. Then I realized, this is a micro analogy for what we do in life generally speaking.

So now, whenever I see my laundry basket and the one, or many items of clothing that need to be washed, despite me just having done a load, I smile and remember to be grateful for the messiness and ongoing-ness of life. There is no pause, there is no one moment where everything is perfect. Because as corny as it sounds, every moment is perfect. We are all perfectly imperfect.

I am pleased to say the egg freezing process went smoothly and the procedure was successful. The two weeks of daily hormone injections, blood tests and scans were intense. But I was more equipped in knowing what to expect, and knew exactly what I was getting myself into, having done it once already. It was less daunting and I understood that in doing this second round, I have done my personal best in keeping my options open so I won’t have regrets, at least on this front. I now have the bloating and weight loss to “deal with” but I feel grateful that I am healthy. I did not end up with hyper-stimulation (so far) and I can move on with my life and put this section to bed. I can earn the money back in the future, but I can’t capture the quality of my eggs down the road. I am proud to have done this, again. And alone. I did not feel sad or lonely. But I did it by myself. (With the support of the ARGC, whose staff members are wonderful.) It felt empowering and reminded me that I am strong and capable. That I am surrounded by love and people whom I can count on, but ultimately, I can count on myself. If you are considering this but not sure, reach out and I would be happy to have a conversation with you. It’s not for everyone, but don’t wait too long to think about it. Time really does fly by and it’s not a must, but I do urge you to seriously consider this. Not enough people talk about how as women, we are taught we can conquer the world, but there are some limitations of biology that we need to factor in.

My life is filled with the souls of women I love. The ones who make my belly ache from laughter, who catch my tears. Who show up on my doorstep to celebrate and grieve, who defend me when I’m unkind to myself. These women will love my children, dance as we age, protect my secrets, share in my joy, sing even when we’re sinking in sorrow. They walk close, promising their lives to me—a marriage without a wedding; a commitment without a ring. If you have these women too, remember: the soulmate is a wonderful thought but look how beautiful these love stories are. Look how they make you full.

By Hannah Rosenberg

So I decided to freeze my eggs. At the age of 38, soon 39, I decided that doing the things within my control would help with surrendering to the things I cannot. The decision was not something that as evident to me right away, it came with time. I write about this thought process in this earlier blog.